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Conversations: John Palmer- SJA's "Porter"
(The following article is an interview with a member of St. Joan of Arc parish. The primary purpose of the interview is to allow a parishioner an opportunity to share some part of their story or journey. These written snapshots are conversations between two people in which the person being interviewed willingly shares their ups, downs, reflections and life lessons with you the reader. We hope that you enjoy these conversations and that they are helpful to you on our journey.)
In the Old Testament Levites were appointed to keep the gates of the temple open.
In the early Christian church ‘reliable men’ were needed to inform the faithful of the time and place of divine services, to open the doors and to welcome those who passed through the church entrance. In the year 2000 and for the last six years, the Church of St. Joan of Arc has standing in the main entrance a stocky 53-year-old gentleman with Swedish and Irish bloodlines, a broad smile, a trim white beard and a very strong handshake. “Welcome to St. Joan’s, how are you?” over and over John Palmer greets the regulars, the new faces, and the happy and unsure faces that come each Sunday for the 9:00 service.
Eight years ago a friend suggested to John Palmer that he check out St. Joan’s Catholic Church. Two years later John Palmer did just that. The second Sunday, Echo Thoren needed help passing out bulletins at the front door, at that point in time John Palmer became his future. Not unfamiliar to life‘s strange turns, from that Sunday on he has been the Welcomer to the 9:00 congregation. What John didn’t know was that St. Joan’s was fulfilling the ancient rite of placing a ‘reliable man’ at the entrance of the church; a Porter. If you stand in the main entrance of St. Joan’s on a Sunday morning and you watch John Palmer greet the men, women, and children streaming through the door, your eye catches the energy this man puts into this simple act of welcoming, then you can understand why the early church fathers wrote this prayer and direction for a Church Porter and a man like John:
“Open to the invisible house of God, namely, the hearts of the faithful, that they may keep in mind the word of God which they have heard and carry it out in deed. May the Lord in His mercy accomplish this in you.”
To sit and talk with John is a good gift, and to ask him questions and listen to the answers is a better one. “So John tell me what you see in the faces of those who come through the doors on Sunday.” I asked. “I see men and women who have been in he trenches of life; some trenches were deeper than others, and they come looking for comfort. Many are like me, they may have hit one of life’s walls and they are looking, searching for something, some call a higher power, others say God. I don’t think of myself as a religious person, my mother is Irish Catholic and my father was Swedish Lutheran and I did attend Catholic grade school In Chicago. There were all those in-between years but like others I have come looking for my higher power later in life and St. Joan’s makes me very comfortable in that search. I know a lot about hitting walls and I know something about being in life’s trenches and I know about life’s blessings. I come to St. Joan’s and stand in the door because I want to give back....I just want to be able to give back.”
John wears his glasses on his nose and he tells about his life journey in bits and pieces. “The Pullman Projects in the south side of Chicago is where I grew up.” There were six kids and I just knew from listening to him that he was the oldest. “I spent too much of my life as a caregiver and I had to learn how not to be a fixer and more of a listener. “You know,” he said, “We men always want to fix everything and what we have to learn is to stop trying to fix everything and learn to be just good listeners. We have to just sit with another person and be present to them.” John could say all this because he grew up very much in a man’s world. Football in high school with thoughts of going pro. He tried college and then there was the mid 60’s and for many American young men like John there was Vietnam; 15 months in the ground forces. He extended his time so he would not have to go back. John in talking uses the word ’walls’: the walls of life, hitting the walls, and yes, with sadness, the Vietnam Memorial Wall. After the army John went back to college, graduated in education and got a masters in Special Education. He married and speaks so proudly of his grown children. “You know,” he said, “When I was about to go overseas to Vietnam, my father just shook my hand and said he would see me in a year. I am not my father, I am all over my kids, I hug them and kiss them and of course embarrass them with my affection. I have to show them how much they mean to me.”
For 27 years John Palmer has been a special education instructor, dean of students, coordinator, etc. Most of his career has been at Dakota County Independent School District 917. Currently he works with autistic students who are young adults. This work is demanding and John speaks glowingly about the other staff members that he considers part of his life support. We care about each other he says. Relationships are key to John. He talked about his six closest friends, three women and three men. I asked if they were all in the Twin Cities and he said the women were but the men were all in Chicago. I commented on the fact that his men friends were so far away. He looked over his glasses at me and said simply, “ We were in Nam together - they understand.”
John can talk about how he came on a visit to Minneapolis years ago and how he decided after three days , this was going to be his new home. He speaks with pride about his first house in Apple Valley. You know, he says, when I was growing up we were poor and this house was for me such a symbol of accomplishment. I would look at my house and realize how far I had come in life. John willingly talks of his work, his bicycle, his need for time to read, and his favorite bench on the River Road where he likes to sit and think. He likes to talk about the value of relationships, and about his own searching, and his enthusiastic love of St. Joan’s.
On a December Sunday when the wind chill was a minus ridiculous, I stood for a time and watched John Palmer stand in the cold and greet people. Gone were the summer shorts that he wears for comfort. I noticed how he would extend his strong hand, or at times put his arm around someone or even say something into someone’s ear. I repeatedly saw this man reach out, touching others, smiling, encouraging and above all, connecting with all these people and I thought about the ancient ritual of the early Church Porter.
Choose a 'Reliable Man’ to inform the faithful, to open the doors and I remembered the prayer that goes with the anointing of a man as a porter in the ancient church:
“Open to the invisible house of God, namely, the hearts of the faithful, that they may keep in mind the word of God which they have heard and carry it out in deed. May the Lord in His mercy accomplish this in you.”
John Palmer was interviewed on December 13, 2000 by Chuck MacDonald
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