What would you like to know about St. Joan of Arc? Do you have a story about our parish or of general interest that you think others would like to hear? For story ideas, contact Jeff Rholl, jeff@stjoan.com.
Congratulations! You have found THE ONE for you. The two of you have decided that St. Joan of Arc will be the perfect place to celebrate your union. At least one of you has been a registered member of the parish for 6 months, so now you can begin the process of marriage preparation, setting the date, and actually planning your wedding. What kind of contribution can you expect from this community in this process?
Marriage preparation at St. Joans begins with a conversation with Roseanne Rogers, who with Echo Thoren, coordinates the many details. Then, it is time for an initial interview with either Father George or Father Jim, who will help you prepare spiritually for this major event in your lives. He will have you complete an inventory designed to get you talking about issues that may not have been considered during the heady days of dating, but which will play a major role in the success and happiness of your marriage. You will also have contact with a mentoring couple, someone who has already been in a successful marriage for a long time, and who will serve as encouraging coaches, to help you look at some of the barriers and blessings in building a strong union.
Another facet of this preparation time that is unexpected, and perhaps unique, is a shared service project. This will involve the two of you working together for a peace or justice effort. It gives you the opportunity to figure out what kind of activities you can share that will enrich yourselves and the larger community. It may involve meal preparation for homeless people, or a Habitat for Humanity building project, or any of a myriad of ways in which you can contribute to bettering this world.
Kathleen Hartmann and Tim Velner are in the middle of this preparation,
with their wedding date set for September 8. The details are starting
to pile up, and they are busily trying to tick items off the list.
Kathleen and Tim have completed the FOCCUS inventory, and have met with their mentoring couple several times. The couple they were matched with are Mary and Michael Samuels, long time parishioners who have been married for 34 years. The Samuels have been mentoring for the past 4 or 5 years, and have found this to be a very interesting and useful ministry. Their time with Kathleen and Tim was valued equally by all four participants. The mentors found this to be an exceptionally mature couple, with many of the issues already discussed in depth while Tim and Kathleen appreciated the insights and support of their mentors. This mutually satisfying experience has been a highlight of what Kathleen calls a completely wonderful preparatory time.
Kathleen and Tim have not yet selected their service project, but that will be coming soon. Their initial contact with Echo has been made, and she will help them in many ways to plan the details of the ceremony.
To get another viewpoint of the process, I spoke with Edie Kalweit, another long time member of St. Joans. Her son was married in the church recently, and Edie offered these observations. "It was an excellent experience. There were about 250 guests, many of whom were of different faiths. All felt embraced by the warmth of Father Jim, who prayed with the entire group at rehearsal the night before the ceremony. Both sets of parents walked their children to the altar area, and the mothers lit candles representing the families of origin. Then the new couple lit their unity candle from these. The whole ceremony was profoundly lovely and meaningful."
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