November 21st-23rd, 2003

“Our true home is in the present moment.” -Thich Nhat Hanh

This is the lesson that Karen Grosscup, Debra Harley and Marlys Weber set out to teach 20 of us would-be peace makers during the course of a 42 hour weekend Peace Retreat.

We had been asked beforehand to bring an object, something that symbolizes peace for us that could be placed on our altar, a coffee table in the center of the main meeting room dominated by a large stone fireplace.

So, on our first night together, we come forward with our offerings, introduce ourselves and explain what meaning that particular thing holds for us. In this way we become known by our symbols which remain on the altar throughout the weekend.

We also gradually get to know one another through music, ritual and song; all integral parts of the entire weekend. There is an almost instant aura of trust that generates personal stories told without embarrassment and coming from the heart. This, some of us conclude, is the result of being St. Joanites. It just comes with the territory.

One of the most meaningful experiences we have is circling around the room and taking turns bowing with folded hands and looking deeply into one another's’ eyes. It is hard to explain how this simple exercise could have such a stunning effect on all of us. It is as though we are suddenly given a flashlight into each others’ souls. What we see there in every case is beauty.

On Saturday morning Karen explains that true peace lies within, but we must dig for it and the best way to do that is in silence and mindfulness.     Meditation, some call it.

Mindful silence, she explains, goes hand-in-hand with paying attention to our breathing, becoming aware of each breath we take. By extension this practice helps us really see and appreciate everything and everyone around us. By staying in the present moment, she assures us, we will eventually  give up worry about the future, or regrets about the past. In this way we obtain a deep appreciation for the only thing we really have: the present moment. This leads to peace and an amazing sense of freedom within ourselves which we can then offer as gifts to the world.

Then she invites us to spend large chunks of our time here in silence, including the noon meal. We turn that concept over a few times, but decide to try it simply because all three leaders say it’s a really good idea.

Karin Grosscup, Deb Harley, Marlys Weber

Our teachers, Karen, Debra and Marlys each bring their own special gifts to the gathering. Karen is a therapist in mental health and works for Hennepin County. Deb is an angelic singer, and songwriter. Marlys is retired from her own business and now works part time for Hennepin County.                 

These accomplished women all carry the added dimension of being long time moms, seasoned with the joys and sorrows of that demanding occupation.

Besides these leaders, Sister Lucy Bruskiewiz, a Franciscan nun and massage therapist, is a participant along with the rest of us this weekend. She makes her healing skills available to any who want them. Those who go to her come away relieved of old aches and pains and awed at her insights into what ails them.

On Saturday our leaders urge us to wander outside using our new found meditation skills on any or all of the surrounding 26.5 acres of the farm. It helps to clear the mind of nonessentials they say. Also the nasal passages, because the winter’s first storm is gathering force on the prairie, its outer edges licking the barns, buildings, fields, animals and any humans in its path.

The most intrepid among us bundle up, take the challenge and come back later with glowing cheeks and teary but shinning eyes. We then eagerly share our stories about what withered yellow-gold corn stalks and rolling hills have to tell us during our trek.

The setting for our lessons in “Becoming Peace,” the title of our retreat, couldn’t have been more in tune with the message. Shalom Hill Farm near Windom, Minnesota, in the southwestern part of the state, is a stationary ship sailing on the rolling ocean of the prairie. Every board, nail, stone and tile of the place bespeaks carefulness of design and intent which add up to the love in plain view everywhere.

Nowhere is this love more apparent than in the food which is served: all organically grown on the premises and prepared by hand in the large modern kitchen of the place. These include homemade breads, delicious salads, lasagna-to-die-for, condiments, desserts and side dishes, including a rice and black bean dish for which everyone wants the recipe.

Saturday evening has us collecting sticks, and decorating them with bits of colored yarn and dried grasses. These represent whatever blocks to peace we may be carrying within us.

Later in a special ceremony we kneel before a brightly burning fire, say a silent prayer and throw our sticks into the fire. Behind each of us stands the next person in line with outstretched arms to insure us safe space while we unburden our souls. The effect is a lightness of mind and body that carries over naturally into the next event - a party!

For this we generate our own music from drums and rattles supplied by Deb. She keeps the beat with her guitar while we circle the room and dance in time to our own music. It is all magical merry making and when it’s over we  form small pools of conversation that, for some, last well into the night.

Sunday morning offers us a chance to continue the celebration with our own liturgy which unites us with our St. Joan family who are celebrating in the same way a hundred and twenty-five miles to our north.

Here is part of one of our prayers:  God of peace. . . . teach us to honor you in every breath we take, word we speak, step we make, thought we think, and person we touch so we may bring your peace into the world. Guide us in honoring your dwelling within and bring us into mindfulness each moment. Help us to remember who we are.

This is how each of our teachers answer the question, What is the one thing you would hope we take away with us from this retreat?    

   

KAREN: Renewed energy and deeper awareness of what we are attached to that has the potential to create violence. These are judgments inside ourselves that we project onto others and take into the world. By being aware of them, we have a better chance of becoming effective agents of the peace process.    

DEBRA:  As we each become peace through mindfulness and open hearts, transformation of the planet becomes more hopeful.    

MARLYS:  My wish is that by forming a strong community this weekend we would attain inner peace in order to go out into the world and work for peace. We cannot work for peace without having peace within.

Suddenly it is time to leave this holy place with its shelter of new found, loving friends.

As with all leavings, this holds some sadness, and on this particular Sunday, a touch of apprehension. The expected storm is in full bloom now and all at once what should have been a comparatively short drive home, looks daunting. For that reason we decide to drive in caravan, then offer prayers for safe journeys for all. Blowing snow which at times obliterates the road challenges us to remember something important we’ve just  learned:  

According to Anthony DeMello, “There are only two things in the world: love and fear. There is only one evil in the world, fear. There’s only one good in the world, love.” St. John in his epistle tells us about the same thing: “There is no fear in love, for perfect love casts out fear.”  

Probably none of us achieved the “perfect” part, but there no doubt were attempts at deep breathing on the drive home and remembering the good part of the present moment: We are all alive right now! 

Jo Welch-Youngren worked with Harvey Egan in the early days of St. Joan of Arc. At that time she, Cy and Joan Speltz, Nancy Anderson, Darlene Arbuckle, Ferry Deslauriers, and John McGowan made up the staff. We all pitched in and did everything that needed doing and had a ball every day. Jo’s first husband, Jack Welch, was buried from St. Joan’s in 1980. Later she married Dave Youngren, moved to New Mexico, then returned to her roots. Now she and Dave sit on the left side center at the 9:00 o’clock Mass on Sundays and love every minute of it. Jo can be reached at JYoundave@aol.com.

Marlys Weber is a St. Joan of Arc'er with a passion for peace and justice issues. Marlys was one of the organizers of the anti-war bus trip to Washington D.C.

Besides that, we were protected by the vow we made before we left,  to make this retreat an annual affair. There is no doubt that Shalom Hill Farm, the friendships we formed, the peace we learned will stay with us no matter the storms that may assail us until we meet again.

The Shalom Hill Farm is located outside of Windom in southwestern Minnesota. They have a website at www.shalomhillfarm.org.